Selfless and Humble
Do you ever wonder why we sometimes start doubting things we were once so sure of?
This has happened to me a few times in my life. In fact, it's happened more than a few times, only there were less than a handful of events that involved relationships. The first was my relationship with God back in the year 2007. This was, of course the most regretful of all doubts because it led me to make some unwise decisions that would affect me for a long time. The next was in my marriage when going through a divorce back in 2009. Most recently, I have doubted my relationship with my boyfriend. In the last blog post, I went into more details about what happened. In this post, I will share what I have learned since then so far.
Very recently, I began studying scriptures about contentment in all situations. I began reading the book of Philippians. I felt a need to read this book. Little did I know that what I began to learn was about a lot more than just contentment. As I looked into, visualized, and re-lived in my thoughts what the apostle Paul was going through while in prison I began to see a Paul that I knew very little of. I have always seen Paul as a strong "warrior" of God, a great leader, an amazing evangelist, and someone who persevered through many challenges. He seemed almost supernatural to me. One characteristic of Paul that I did not often think about was his selflessness. While in prison, not knowing what would happen to him while there, Paul did not pity himself. He certainly did not blame God. Paul did something that still amazes me as I think about it. He wrote this letter to his brothers and sisters in the church in Philippi with the purpose of encouraging them. That's it. He was finding ways to give as he spend his days in a prison. He had no moral support in prison and yet he gave moral support to his spiritual family.
Now, I must clarify that I had seen these scriptures often in the past, but never have I felt them to be more applicable to my life than now. Just yesterday I found myself broken, in tears, begging God for forgiveness for how selfish I have been, especially in the last few months. My dating relationship has really exposed my selfish heart. Not only has my heart been selfish, but also quite prideful as I began to see a lot of my "self righteous" sinful nature coming out in comments I would make or even in demands. Demands? Who am I to make demands? The world teaches us, especially women, to demand. We must "demand respect". We must "demand our place". We want to be first in our man's life no matter what. Even Christian women often make this mistake without realizing it. I thought of another scripture that applies in Luke 6:41 " Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?" I realized that I was also being very judgmental at times and did not see my responsibility in anything.
There's a quote that comes to mind: "The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeing new landscapes, but in having new eyes. What we perceive is quite often not reality. Whether we want to or not, we often judge with our emotions and we are often wrong.
There's a scripture that also comes to mind and is in fact more powerful that the quote " The heart is deceitful above all things...who can understand it?" -Jeremiah 17:9.
We can be very deceived to think we're right all the time. I mean, sure sometimes we are right. I don't want to diminish our capacity as women and our "sixth sense" as some people call it. I believe we were given this gift by God to see what men often don't see. However this gift is not to be used to be judgmental in a negative way. It is meant to help us make wiser decisions about our own lives and if we are wives, it helps us give insight to our husbands so that he may make the best choice. The choice however is still his to make-let's not forget that ;) (1 Peter 3:7).
For those of us who are not married (or not yet married;)), we have a similar role, except it is to our brothers in Christ. Whether we are dating them or whether we are just friends, we must be mindful of our tendencies to be judgmental and critical. We must also be careful about being too "bossy or demanding". I have learned (the hard way) that all this does is tear our brothers down. It does not help them at all.
I want to encourage all who are reading this (especially the women) to really meditate on the scriptures mentioned above. I encourage you to read Philippians 1 and 2 and ask God to show you where your heart is or has been. If it has been where mine has been, I encourage you to take the time to reflect and pray humbling yourself before God and to make some life changing decisions.
It will make a world of difference both in your lives and in the lives of those your love.
To God be the Glory.
This has happened to me a few times in my life. In fact, it's happened more than a few times, only there were less than a handful of events that involved relationships. The first was my relationship with God back in the year 2007. This was, of course the most regretful of all doubts because it led me to make some unwise decisions that would affect me for a long time. The next was in my marriage when going through a divorce back in 2009. Most recently, I have doubted my relationship with my boyfriend. In the last blog post, I went into more details about what happened. In this post, I will share what I have learned since then so far.
Very recently, I began studying scriptures about contentment in all situations. I began reading the book of Philippians. I felt a need to read this book. Little did I know that what I began to learn was about a lot more than just contentment. As I looked into, visualized, and re-lived in my thoughts what the apostle Paul was going through while in prison I began to see a Paul that I knew very little of. I have always seen Paul as a strong "warrior" of God, a great leader, an amazing evangelist, and someone who persevered through many challenges. He seemed almost supernatural to me. One characteristic of Paul that I did not often think about was his selflessness. While in prison, not knowing what would happen to him while there, Paul did not pity himself. He certainly did not blame God. Paul did something that still amazes me as I think about it. He wrote this letter to his brothers and sisters in the church in Philippi with the purpose of encouraging them. That's it. He was finding ways to give as he spend his days in a prison. He had no moral support in prison and yet he gave moral support to his spiritual family.
Now, I must clarify that I had seen these scriptures often in the past, but never have I felt them to be more applicable to my life than now. Just yesterday I found myself broken, in tears, begging God for forgiveness for how selfish I have been, especially in the last few months. My dating relationship has really exposed my selfish heart. Not only has my heart been selfish, but also quite prideful as I began to see a lot of my "self righteous" sinful nature coming out in comments I would make or even in demands. Demands? Who am I to make demands? The world teaches us, especially women, to demand. We must "demand respect". We must "demand our place". We want to be first in our man's life no matter what. Even Christian women often make this mistake without realizing it. I thought of another scripture that applies in Luke 6:41 " Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?" I realized that I was also being very judgmental at times and did not see my responsibility in anything.
There's a quote that comes to mind: "The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeing new landscapes, but in having new eyes. What we perceive is quite often not reality. Whether we want to or not, we often judge with our emotions and we are often wrong.
There's a scripture that also comes to mind and is in fact more powerful that the quote " The heart is deceitful above all things...who can understand it?" -Jeremiah 17:9.
We can be very deceived to think we're right all the time. I mean, sure sometimes we are right. I don't want to diminish our capacity as women and our "sixth sense" as some people call it. I believe we were given this gift by God to see what men often don't see. However this gift is not to be used to be judgmental in a negative way. It is meant to help us make wiser decisions about our own lives and if we are wives, it helps us give insight to our husbands so that he may make the best choice. The choice however is still his to make-let's not forget that ;) (1 Peter 3:7).
For those of us who are not married (or not yet married;)), we have a similar role, except it is to our brothers in Christ. Whether we are dating them or whether we are just friends, we must be mindful of our tendencies to be judgmental and critical. We must also be careful about being too "bossy or demanding". I have learned (the hard way) that all this does is tear our brothers down. It does not help them at all.
I want to encourage all who are reading this (especially the women) to really meditate on the scriptures mentioned above. I encourage you to read Philippians 1 and 2 and ask God to show you where your heart is or has been. If it has been where mine has been, I encourage you to take the time to reflect and pray humbling yourself before God and to make some life changing decisions.
It will make a world of difference both in your lives and in the lives of those your love.
To God be the Glory.
Amen. Thanks for sharing your heart!
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